State of Containment
April 8, 2020
I’m honestly not sure as to how I should begin this journal entry or how to structure. I feel like a painter wanting to throw different colored paints over a blank canvas with this entry. Here sitting at my kitchen table thinking what to write I can only think about how stressful life stressful is for me at the moment, in my background I hear news reporters talk about the rise in the COVID-19 cases across the city and precautions people should take towards fixing it. This whole situation has greatly affected on a mental aspect as I feel like I’m imprisoned by the orders of Governor Cuomo and that of my mind. As for school, I am still struggling to accept the transition from campus to online instruction. As much as going to school in person takes time it made me realize how much more I prefer it over the recent online instructions.
During these stressful days I have taken some action to clear my mind, although, it has been kind of difficult with all the noise and technology in my surrounding environment. For one, taking walks has helped me clear my mind to somewhat of an extent. Additionally, I go for bike rides, recently I rode through Lower Manhattan and on the Brooklyn Bridge. Doing those make me feel free but it forces me to be really cautious as I am outside and become more vulnerable to getting sick. If I am not outside doing neither of the two, I would try to take a nap, which does not come easily. These are the times when I feel most stress free and not heavily focusing on what is going on in the world.
15 April 2020
It’s been a week since my last entry and I still feel the same, I’m truly over this situation and it’s making me wonder whether or not there will be a summer this year because a break is much needed right now. Everyday feels the same, with same routine that includes of waking up late and going to bed late. At time I don’t even be knowing what date it is days at a time if I don’t check my phone lock screen. I feel like I’m going to lose my mind going through this same routine these days.
Now that the death toll has reached 10,000 in our state it makes me wonder whether state officials will take an extra step to help in the containment of the virus’ spread, specifically shutting down MTA. That is a long stretch, although it will have a big impact if it were to happen. Especially now that trains are running on essential services timing, it creates for large crowds of people in a space, which certainly does not acknowledge social distancing. So, if this is shut down less people will presumably want to travel potentially correlating to a slower spread. If I was in DeBlasio’s position I would, definitely do it although it will greatly affect essential workers.
22 April 2020
Kim Todd’s essay Curious from her journal River Teeth explains the concept of curiosity within humans and how her own led to her traveling to Surinam looking for her own answer to things. My mind kept wandering back to the MET Museum’s “Making Marvels” Exhibit’s ‘Dresden Green’ which brought much curiosity about its existence, concerning its formation when hearing about the Suriname toad in this case. As humans we normally want to know the details of things, questioning why something is the way it is or how it came to then proceed to see what we could regarding that information. So, in this case it does not really surprise me about the extent people will go explore as curiosity they have. Kim Todd’s efforts of exploring the curiosity behind that of Maria Sibylla Merian’s did surprise me, in her actually traveling to make observations and do personal research, because in my curiosity of it I would only go as far as using the internet information present on it.
A time when I chased an epistemic question that dilated my pupils, was when I had Philosophy in my first semester of college and we were learning of free-will and determinism. I guess it was because my religious views and personal views were conflicting, so I was stuck on deciding. I kind of do believe both, doing things by own free-will but some things have been determined for me already. I did some brief research, on each of the two I ultimately ended up leaving it at seeing them as connected with each other.
29 April 2020
During this period of sheltering in place it has really given me some time to process what personally reflect on myself and process what the world is going through. First and for most, one of the most important things for me now is definitely space. I say space, because of social distancing of course but also due to the fact that I want space to myself to be able to think and do stuff for leisure briefly like use social media, watch Netflix without much distractions. At times, this can be hard cause I have somewhat of a big family, and they can be noisy from time to time. Speaking of time, it happens to be one of the most important things as well although it is weird for me because I feel like I have enough of it to do things, but it does not truly feel that way for me as I trying balancing between school and work (gourmet market). I have learned that even with time and space for me, it still has been difficult to use them properly.
As for reaching outward, during this period of sheltering in place it has made me realize several things. One being, misinformation, this is especially a big one because when you are on social media or hearing people like Trump sharing non-sense myths about the virus it makes you wonder what encourages them and/or gain from doing so. However, I do follow news updates on the virus and additional measures to take to stay protected. Secondly, I have learned that some people rather put their needs over the safety of others and that is selfish to think, especially when others are being mindful of them trying to help improve the situation.
6 May 2020
Personally, I would like a return to the classroom next semester. Unfortunately, I do not think the current situation will be entirely resolved and safe by then so I do not think on campus learning will be taking place. I definitely do miss being in a classroom, because I feel like you have access to the professors and students right there without having to worry about any questions or concerns you have being ignored. Also, this online learning has made me appreciate the classroom because when I am there distractions are at a minimum and I can actually focus.
Robert E. Marshak was an American Physicist, and also former President of City College. The words that I would include for the mural are Socially Phased, We Matter, Co(I)mmunity, PRAGMATIC.
13 March 2020
For the current time being, this diary I titled “State of Containment” has given me something to looking forward to on a weekly basis especially, in a time when the future is looking much more uncertain than before and all you got to do at this point is hope for things to be better and return. This experience has been entirely nerve-racking. All can think about is the stuff I miss which include sports, going out to places/restaurants, even going to school and being able to celebrate my 20th birthday out.
Looking back on my earlier days in writing this diary, I will say however that it was a bit more stressful than because as time passes, I’ve become accustomed to it. The mask wearing, glove wearing, listening to Governor Cuomo’s home stay increase announcements have become the norm these days, but feels like it has always been taking place- almost like we are in a loop from day to day. Every other week that passes I’m eating the same thing whether it be pizza, chicken or a sandwich and it gets boring honestly. With the free time I have outside of school and work I will probably be watching anime or going for a walk/bike ride to clear my mind and getting some fresh of course (sounds a bit harsh, as being out I am more vulnerable). School has been frustrating since the transition from in-person to online learning and I feel as if though I am not really having classes to be learn anything but instead to just work and earn a grade for it. This experience has made me much more appreciative of in-person learning and I hope for the fall semester it is that way but thinking realistically that is highly unlikely. In closing, I just want to say in times like this even when there seems to not be much to do I think it best to maximize and use your time wisely towards trying to learn something like cooking, or do some drawing, work on a potential brand/business idea you might have.
